"Wakey, wakey!" I say to the Ex-Vampire Lord.
"Thanks for rescuing me from an awful dream!" replies a grateful ex-vampire.
"What was your dream about?" asks a reptilian humanoid, standing next to a daytime werewolf.
"I was browsing the InterWebs in my dream," admits the ex-vampire.
"Really? You had a nightmare about the Internet?" scoffs the Vampire Lady.
"I had a visceral reaction to the subconsciously-generated propaganda I read...in my sleep," the ex-vampire explains...sort of.
"Sounds...harrowing?" she patronizes. The Ex-Vampire Lord might want to try laying off the social media for a while, after such a "YouTwitFace" dream.
He should spend his time haunting T-shirts, instead:
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