Webcomic #011e: Jingle Bells?

"Did you know that 'Jingle Bells' was copyrighted as 'The One Horse Open Sleigh'?" asks Justine.  She's really not asking a question, but showing off her Wikipedia skillz.

"Aye, that filthy number," replies the priest, who happens to be a reptilian humanoid.

"How is 'Jingle Bells' dirty?"

"You must go beyond the first verse," he advises, formulating his conspiracy theory.

"Dashing thro’ the snow,

In a one-horse open sleigh,

O’er the hills we go,

Laughing all the way;

Bells on bob tail ring,

Making spirits bright,

Oh what sport to ride and sing

A sleighing song to night.

"Verse two:  Reckless driving."

A day or two ago,

I thought I’d take a ride,

And soon Miss Fannie Bright

Was seated by my side,

The horse was lean and lank;

Misfortune seemed his lot,

He got into a drifted bank,

And we, we got upsot.

"Verse three:  Not being a Good Samaritan."

A day or two ago,

The story I must tell

I went out on the snow

And on my back I fell;

A gent was riding by

In a one-horse open sleigh,

He laughed as there I sprawling lie,

But quickly drove away.

"Verse four:  Girls.  Fast cars.  Okay, fast horses.  Slurring entendres.  'And sing this sleighing song'?"

Now the ground is white

Go it while you’re young,

Take the girls to night

And sing this sleighing song;

Just get a bob tailed bay

Two forty as his speed.

Hitch him to an open sleigh

And crack, you’ll take the lead.

"Fast whores."

Amused and confused, Justine responds:  "I was just going to say that a competing tune called 'Buckley's Celebrated Sleighing song' wasn't as lucky."

I guess the reptilian humanoid holy man wouldn't like The Beatles, either.  "The One Horse Open Sleigh" is by James Piermont, and I just recorded it (I'll share a link soon!)...with some cowbell.

It could have used more cowbell, though.

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