I'm Only 39% Cool

I don't know where Posterous will embed the attached image, so please use this link for reference, just in case.  Anyhow, I saw this list of "Ways to Be Cool" apparently written by a kid at Cajun Boy's blog, but it's probably been around the Web a few times.  Since I don't have anything heavy on my mind (for a general Web audience, that is), I'll compare myself to this kid's ideal of cool:

1. Motorcycles - No, sadly.
2. Wear cologne - Not anymore.
3. Move to Williamsburg - Why?  Only the truly cool would know, I suppose.
4. Learn to speak European - YES, I know a handful of European languages, enough to say "I don't understand," "I don't know," "Would you want a beer or a glass of wine?" and "In the hotel."  One on the list so far.
5. Grow facial hair - It's a bit patchy, but it photographs sort of well.  Make that two.
6. Helmets - No.
7. Mohawk - No.
8. Designer shoes - No.
9. Subscribe to Vice - No.
10. Psychrock...? - I can do that.  Psychadelic rock, perhaps?  I guess that's three.
11. Leather jackets - I have a hand-me-down from the '80s.  It's now four.
12. Ambercroombie [sic] & Flitch [sic] - Quite possibly two of my favorite prostitutes.  Otherwise, no.
13. Learn to play guitar - I've done that.  Five.
14. Irony - Sure.  Six.
15. Become a band photographer - I'm in the band, not the bloody photog.
16. Wear all black - I've done that.  Somewhat simplifies doing the laundry.  Seven.
17. "Hollywood" - I may run a film production company, but I don't buy the hype.
18. Online friendships - I have a few.  Eight.
19. 360's - I have no idea what this kid is trying to say.
20. Make your own movie - Élan Vital and assorted other productions.  Nine.
21. EXXXTREME (everything) - No.  I am ashamed.
22. Eat more meat - I've been eating less recently.
23. Hang out w/ Steve - EPIC FAIL on my behalf.

I'm not cool at all, only scoring 9 out of 23.  Even more uncool is that I used a calculator to estimate the percentage, which is about 39%.

Posted via email from DeRamos' Clipboard