Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Crony Communism Strikes Again!

Economics 101 from George W. Bush, MBA:

The worst part is that Treasury Secretary Paulson is essentially asking for no oversight and no consequences in whatever $700 billion scheme his cabal is cookin'. (Scheme, cabal - talk about weasel words!) Obviously, both major candidates are currently taking a "man of the people - vote for me" stand by holding off judgment unless the proposed bailout benefits the average voter, I mean, taxpayer. Since this Friday's debate is supposed to be about foreign policy, we'll see what Senators McCain and Obama really think of the Bush/Paulson plan if and when it comes to a vote.

It really does reek of some sort of American-style communism: An ironic, Toby Keith sing-along, Dane Cook fan, gas-guzzlin' SUV of Marxist theory. Here's my take on things that reek of communism: I support universal/socialized health care of minors, as I believe all kids deserve a decent minimum standard of life, whether born to riches or not. It would be nice to have the Declaration of Independence's truth of all men being created equal to ring true once in a while. For obvious reasons, the American government should be limited to helping kids in America, but hopefully the sentiment goes global, while keeping national borders intact. That said, I (who's not a minor) would not be against getting some better health care myself, but this is not to say that I would adamantly support a universal health plan - if it's there, it would be against my interest to reject it.

However, this massive bailout for the ownership class does not bode well for me. It also didn't bode well for the dude who made more than a million investing in the recent roller coaster of Goldman Sachs - he made a nice chunk of change, but at what cost? Many who previously rallied for the absolute power of the Bush Administration are now opposed to this permutation of UNLIMITED POWER! in the executive branch. That's funny. Suddenly the pro-totalitarian, "patriot" right is back to being about limited Federal government conservatism.

Anyway, large scale communism (especially to the tune of $700 billion and in the key of totalitarianism) doesn't work. Okay, it works in theory, in Plato's Realm of Forms (the Form of Communism enacted by the Form of Government and obeyed by the Form of Citizens), and whether you fundies like it or not - communism works in Christian heaven (last as first, first as last, and crowns for everyone!).

However, it didn't work for the Soviet empire. Red China is looking more and more like a totalitarian capitalist society under a single-party government buying American debt (somewhat like the dude playing another dude, who's playing another dude). I didn't scheme and plot and conspire my way to the fringes of the ownership class to be part of communist nation. So here's the deal, Wall Street: If you want the bailout, it's a loan. At a ridiculous college credit card interest rate. With a minimum payment due every month. I can print out a promissory note right now. It shouldn't be a stock sale to the government. If it is, then it's only a matter of time before the government gets into manufacturing widgets and peddling trinkets. And poisoning our children to malevolently and secretly curb overpopulation.

In any case, live well, my friends.

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